Its been a month since I wrote here, and what a month its been. By that I mean---terrible. I fell into a very very deep hole of sadness and anxiety for a whole host of reasons, many of which are still going on. I'm still very much in that dark place, but I'm starting to---every now and again---see a sliver of light in the future.
I knew I was feeling more like myself when I opened up my planner after several weeks ignoring it, and made a list for today that included writing here AND making monthly goals for November. I've been just doing the things I HAVE to each day, without really making a plan for long term projects or even thinking about what I may WANT to do. What I really really want to do is feel better. And I know some things I need to do to get there. I just needed to climb slightly out of the hole to be able to actually recognize how far down I'd fallen.