Better

 Ha! What a rant. I was super cranky last week, just some annoying things piling up, the "pebbles in your shoe" type thing that you live with until you can't. I went home, had take-out and wine, and went to bed and felt 100% better in the morning. And I spent a couple of hours catching up and planning on Sunday & didn't even have that "Sunday scaries" feeling that I've been getting for a few weeks. 

I did a LOT less cooking last weekend and a lot more ignoring my kids. Got some social time, when L's friend and his mom came over for a play date---we all sat by the fire pit outside while the boys played Nintendo and the mom & I drank wine and chatted. IT WAS SO SO NICE to have adult conversation! I also finished my book & started a new one (which I've since finished), so I'm out of my reading slump. 

This week has been much better, even though I've had more clinics/meetings. Honestly, I do love my job. Its challenging but very rewarding, and I love that I get to do so many different things---clinical, administrative, research, teaching/mentoring.  Though it does take a lot of mental energy and planning to keep all the balls in the air, and I notice I need more down time these days.

I haven't planned anything concretely for this weekend, but have a vague idea of going for a hike Saturday, another fire pit play date (different kid and parents!), and playing a very long game of star wars monopoly (the kids have been obsessed with playing this, but we can't ever finish a game because we just don't have enough time on the week days). I'm also going to go to an in-person indoors barre class (!!) at my old studio---they are doing a trial run with a handful of vaccinated clients (and a vaccinated teacher), 6 feet apart the whole time, bringing your own equipment, with temp checks and masks. I'm mostly doing it to support them because they are a great neighborhood biz and contribute a lot to the community. But also, it seems fun.

Its a constant give and take of me recognizing what I need to feel happy sane, and finding the time/energy to do it in the midst of the usual work/parenting/life stuff, but I need to remind myself of how horrible I feel when I let things slide (sleep, alone time, reading,  planning, delegating, talking to colleagues/friends to vent, and effectively complaining when its necessary instead of just "sucking it up" and letting it fester) so I'll keep that rant up (I was so ready to delete it when I woke up and felt better!)

I need to go tell B to stop bouncing his ball so freakin' loud on the stairs. He's supposed to be in school!