Or where I ask the internet for advice that I might actually follow (this time).
noticed today that I have recently written several comments urging
bloggy-friends to seek professional help, or to congratulate them for
seeking same help. Yet...
I have pointedly ignored several comments on my own blog from bloggy-friends suggesting that I myself seek professional help.
know several bloggers that have eloquently and generously shared their
own therapy experiences, which I found immensely helpful in
understanding what to expect in both individual and marital counseling.
And I am certain it would help. But I can't seem to take the first
Why? Good old-fashioned laziness. And the
tried-and-true, "oh I don't want to be a bother"-itis, wherein I don't
want to take time or money for myself when certainly I could just PULL
IT TOGETHER FOR THE LOVE ANA, there is nothing really WRONG, is there???
then I'll feel that sinking feeling I get walking home from work on
Friday night, imaging an entire weekend full of opportunities for
potentially yelling at my kids, or picking a fight with my husband, or
hiding in the closet for a freaking moment of peace. Or I'll be sobbing
in the bathroom, shaking with rage and disappointment after yet another
pointless circular fight with G.
I think I need to talk to someone. But here is the question:
opinions on whether I should see someone for myself, or whether (since a
lot of my issues are indeed related to communication issues with G)
should we see someone together?
Pros for going myself:
I don't need to involve G or "convince" him to go, its covered by
insurance, I can only change myself so maybe I should focus on that. Maybe I can't work on the marriage until I've worked on myself?
of going together: Finally, FINALLY (hopefully) an outside person that
can help us break out of 10-year-old unproductive patterns of
communication and fighting. To finally be able to know what he's
thinking instead of constantly guessing and assuming and often getting
it wrong. G is remarkably resistant to anything I tell him second hand, and immediately responsive to first-hand recommendations from "authority figures" or third parties.
What do you guys think?