Blink of An Eye

Everything is fine. But we had quite a scare this weekend.

Saturday was actually a lovely day. It was warm---60 degrees! and it put B in an abnormally cheerful mood. He didn't complain about going to swimming, and actually paid attention and had fun. He wanted to come with  me to the grocery store & was helpful and inquisitive the whole time---just amazing. This is a kid that generally goes on about hating EVERYTHING because its BORING and mommy is MEAN and he's MAD. It was a much needed solace for my battered mommy soul. I enjoyed it while it lasted.

I wanted to take them to the park because 60 DEGREES! In FEBRUARY! We have to take advantage of that! But they were grumpy and the park was BORING and I was MEAN for making them go, but I bribed them with cookies and G agreed to go (daddy is never mean) and we head off to the schoolyard. Of course the SECOND they got outside and felt the sun on their face, the grumpiness resolved and we had a lovely time racing around the park on their scooters. B needed the bathroom so G took him home and was going to bring him right back. And then I got a call. "We had a little accident and we're not coming back" An accident? "B fell on an uneven patch of sidewalk" Is he OK? "not really. the handlebar got him right near the eye. I'm getting ice to put on it. It really hurts". OK, we are heading home.

I got home to a subdued, whimpering kid, lying on the couch, with blood around his eye, which was rapidly swelling shut. We put ice on it. Cleaned off the blood to find scrapes & cuts around his eye.  Checked his vision, which seemed fine. He wanted to sleep and kept dozing off.I called the doctor, who calmly and rationally assured me that the front of the face is far from the head---there is no way he could've had a head injury, and he's probably just sleepy from all the activity and to let him sleep. But G had set the boys up with the ipad to watch shows so he could keep the ice pack on, so we did that for a while. B didn't eat the snacks we set out. He refused cheese pizza for dinner (he could eat it every day for breakfast lunch and dinner) and refused to eat even a bite of a sandwich (this is my kid that eats more than I do, and I eat a LOT by all estimations). He didn't even want the juice we went out and got (juice is a VERY special, very coveted treat). He wanted to go to sleep. He said he was cold (it wasn't cold). He said his face didn't hurt, nothing hurt. He started falling asleep and wasn't really answering our questions.

G and I conferred very briefly. I had been, the whole time, freaking out, despite what the doctor said. so when he asked me what my instincts were and I said we should take B to the ER. (I know, I don't trust my instincts any more than I trust anyone else's, but I was NOT comfortable and we would have a harrowing miserable night of me waking B up every 5 minutes to do a neurological exam on him that would probably have resulted in an ER visit at 3 am when I could no longer rationalize). We decided G would go instead of me, despite the fact that I usually handle the medical stuff, for obvious reasons)---while I'm usually pretty calm in the face of blood & fevers & procedures, this was FREAKING ME OUT. I could not be lighthearted and joke around with B, I knew too much. I know, and have recently been reminded by the experiences of others, how everything can turn on a dime. How your life can fall apart in the blink of an eye. How lucky we have been so far, but who are we to be spared? When is it going to be our turn? I was not my usual rational, logical, lets get this done self. And my fear would obviously not be good for a child that was already trembling at the thought of having to go to the hospital. Thankfully G was up for the task. 

They left home at 6:30. They did not get home until 2AM. I got lots of text updates, and we facetimed and the brothers sent videos back and forth before L went to bed at 8. The rest of the time would qualify as some of the longest hours of my recent life---just waiting, not knowing what was going on, and terrified. I slept with L, because he insisted, so I was awake, on my phone, lying next to him with him holding me ear, for several hours. Of course I scrolled facebook. I also snuck away and stress ate some carbs.

L was so so upset. He was crying, sad, wanted his brother to be better, wanted to go to the hospital so he could see him and see what they were going to do to him, and even turning his tears off so he could perform his usual clownish dance routines so I could videotape them and send them to his brother "so he can laugh and feel better". (This kid. I don't know how we got so lucky with him). He was also exhausted, so thankfully he fell asleep and stayed asleep.

B threw up right when the resident came to see him. But then he was more awake and alert. He DID laugh at L's video. They didn't think a Head CT was needed---again, the mechanism of injury would not likely cause a serious head injury, he didn't hit his head (and he had a helmet in case he had). They wanted optho to see him, though, because it was so near his eye and the cut under the eye may need a stitch. It took 2.5 hours for her to come, she put drops in his eyes to dilate. Came back 30 minutes later, the drops didn't work. Repeat. She may want to stitch the cut vs. glue. Confer with attending. I told G to say NO to sedation for stitch, but they opted for glue. Everything fine, its nearly midnight now. B is sleeping. They need to po challenge him and watch him walk. 2 hours later all that is done. They can't tell if he had a concussion because he's so sleepy because its the middle of the night. We get a list of things to watch for. Finally finally they get home & of course I still can't sleep---we are all camped out on the floor of the boys room because I wanted to keep an eye on B, too. I imagine us all sleeping in the next day, maybe going to brunch, watching movies, having an easy day.

Ha! L is up at 7, B wakes up at 8. HUNGRY. Grumpy. Complaining, fighting. i.e back to normal. We have our regularly scheduled day of gym, chores, playdate with B's friend at the park, cooking, etc... Within minutes of him being up, all my vows for being patient and gentle with him evaporated. Nothing has changed, and for that I am forever thankful.