Tuesday, December 20, 2016

For What Its Worth...

I've thought about posting here, many times. Just never felt motivated enough to actually do it. Its been a fun, full couple of weeks. I am, however, starting to feel a little underlying anxiety about our upcoming long-ass trip to MIL. Its just such a long time to spend together, without the distraction of work and our usual activities at home. I can do anything for 11 days, I can do anything for 11 days,... This mantra got me through tough months in residency, call stretches in fellowship, and many many MIL visits!

Operation Moderation has been a resounding...failure. Not that I'm not moderating. The execution is going pretty well, despite many outings and occasions. Its the OUTCOME that is sub-optimal. I just keep gaining. Now my freaking pajama pants feel uncomfortably tight! I'm pretty sure it is related to the P@xil but I'm not sure what to do about it, besides eat less and less. I'm thinking of tabling this whole thing until January, because holidays/family stress and "dieting" don't mix well for me. Add hangry to the usual frustrations and you've got a disaster waiting to happen.

We had B's 7th birthday party last weekend. Lego Ninjago was the theme, and we had super cute Ninjago cupcakes (that i made & G decorated), a Ninjago pinata, and 45 minutes of karate facilitated by the instructors at the studio B goes to for karate/after-school care. The highlight for all the kids was getting to kick a wooden board in half. Man they were so proud, it was adorable. A lot of his classmates showed up, and some other friends. We had a box of wine for the adults, and plenty of pizza. A good time was had by all. I think we throw good parties. Low-key, low-budget, good fun. The kids were talking about it in the drop off line Monday morning, so clearly it was a hit.

I usually look forward to the fresh clean slate of a new year, but for some reason 2017 is not calling to me. I mean, this was a remarkably shitty year for me personally and as a citizen of the world. I wish I could feel hopeful that next year will be better---and the threshold is set pretty damn low here---but it seems like the world is falling apart around us, spiraling downward faster than I can blink. I will focus on my own little corner and the small ways I can help and then try my best to be present and enjoy the journey. I can do anything for 1461 days...just doesn't have the same ring to it.


  1. I have a lot of weight to lose and not much in the way of holiday goings on and I'm STILL waiting until the new year to get serious about dealing with it. Mine is stress eating/getting injured and unable to move. Not a good combo.

    I found this article (not giving medical advice here, but I'm going to try this so thought I'd share) which is about foods that will help the brain with serotonin and the advice is different from regular weight loss advice. (Not the same at all in fact.) I'm going to try it myself to see how it goes.


    1. thanks Em. that article DEFINITELY went again the way I think about healthy eating for myself & my patients. I don't know what hte science behind their recommendations are---how did they measure brain 5HT production after ingestion of carbs vs. protein or fat? But I'm also a fan of trying things on until you find the right fit for you when it comes to healthy lifestyle.