Saturday, December 31, 2011


"If you think back, and replay your year - if it doesn't bring you tears of joy or sadness, consider the year wasted." (John Cage, from Ally McBeal). 

Replaying highlights:
January:  Finish round 1 of Clomid started on B's first birthday. Start paperwork for faculty job I was offered at the end of December (!) Start lots of resolutions to try to reclaim my body, relationship, friendships, career, and self after B's first year and before (hopefully) getting pregnant again. Miss scheduled IUI due to huge snowstorm and resigned to waiting another month, because we certainly need additional people in the room to make babies. Test at end of month because period is a day late and I want a glass of wine. Oh My God. Test again. And again. And again. Yup.
February/March/April: Whirlwind of nausea, exhaustion, and anxiety interspersed with wicked winter viruses and 5 ear infections for B. Have scary (to me) numbers on first trimester screening but opted to forgo CVS. All resolutions clearly went down the toilet along with most of my meals.
May: Emerge. Travel to see friends. Find out we're having a brother for B and that he is perfect. Turn 35. Cry a little on the bus on my way to work that day because I am just so happy.
June-September: Get huge, hot, and uncomfortable. Cry one weekend because I am JUST. SO. TIRED. and cannot enjoy B or anything else. G takes on most househould tasks and a large percentage of toddler-wrangling, and is subsequently also exhausted and depressed, and I feel like a waste of space (oh so much space, too!) Put in 2 major grants and defend masters thesis at 36 weeks pregnant. Start this blog. 
October: L arrives. Breastfeeding kicks my ass for a bit but in the end I emerge victorious!
November: Our first weeks alone as a family of 4. Glorious. L starts sleeping better, too. Bliss.
December: Back to work. Faculty position kicks in. Struggles with MIL and in my relationship with B. L is becoming such a delight and a balm to my soul. G & I grow closer through all the tumult.

Excuse me while I get a tissue. It's been quite a year.


  1. I like this, and I agree it's been quite a year for you! I may do something similar on my own blog.....

    Congratulations on your faculty position! And on your grant submissions. I hope you get them!

  2. And also, I can't believe L is already 3 months old. Time certainly does fly!