Maybe its hormonal or maybe 10 mg of Paxil is just not enough but I'm feeling super "down in the dumps" as L says, this week. Just---sad. On the verge of tears. Nothing is wrong, nothing happened, I can't pinpoint ANYTHING to explain it.
I had a fabulous weekend on my own (the play was great and the dinner was awesome). I got work done, cooked and prepped for the week but also got to go to the play/dinner, ordered take out, slept in, and watched loads of TV. My parents were here M-W which was nice, and absorbed some of the childcare load.
It sucks because I generally love this time of year. L's birthday is Saturday and we have a great party planned, that I still need to do a LOT to prep for, and I'm just not feeling the mojo. The thought of all that small talk and cheerfulness seems exhausting to me right now, even though I generally love all the parents and was looking forward to seeing everyone together.
Even one of my long-term patients and the MA in our clinic noticed that I seemed tired/not my usual self this week, and L made the "down in the dumps" comment, so I have to try harder to keep a smile plastered on my face I guess. Oh well, off to fake it til I make it some more!
We just passed the equinox. Happens to me every year, and then gets better in a week or two. I feel down too (but, there was a trigger. An expected trigger that I can totally handle, but a trigger nonetheless). I need to get better at not catastrophizing.
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